PhDzilla 02


by P. Zilla, University of Monstrous Meaningful

After initially establishing characteristics for the identification of a PhDzilla, we now will discuss in some depth the evolution of this specimen. As remarked, in an annotation to the last paper, PhDzillas belong to the family of workaholics. Thus, they are in danger of spontaneous mutation processes, when put under stress. When you meet the average PhD student on campus, and want to avoid her or him turning into a PhDzilla, under no circumstances ask the following questions:

 

  1. So how is your project going?
  2. How far are you with writing?
  3. When is your next supervisor meeting?
  4. Have you had you review yet?

Scientists explored the devastating results these questions can have. They effect directly the gene pool of PhD students. The stress triggered by these questions, initiates the horrible spontaneous mutation process that turns Postgraduate students into PhDzillas. Exogenic signs of the beginning mutation process are;

  • an increasingly reddish shade covering eventually the whole eye,
  • the reshaping of teeth into fangs
  • and a slow but sturdy change from normal human skin colour into a variety of bright greens and purples.

The cause of the mutation is a deep fear of failure. PhDzillas are not able, to experience the fear of failure as a measurement for constructive self critique, and something that keeps them in line. For a PhDzilla the fear of failure becomes an overwhelming feeling that initially paralyses them and then starts the mutation process. This mutation process, as discussed in the earlier paper, will lead to the self-destruction of the PhDzilla. And, if you are not fast enough, you will end up as lunch snack.

To be continued …

P. Zilla (R.O.A.R.)

 

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